Author: Ebonie-March̩ Jones | Date: 16 August 2011
We all own something that, when used correctly, makes, if not the world our corner of it, a better place. I'm taking about the tongue. Yes, that little member of the body that has the ability to build up, tear down, quell any confrontation, or ignite the showdown of the century.
Yes, the tongue is a double edged sword with which each of us are armed. I'm sure you've met people who seemed just perfect. They were nicely groomed, well dressed, and then they opened their mouth and what came out was nonsense. Perhaps you called someone in for an interview because the resume and cover letter were exceptional. During the interview, you realized that person's ability to communicate verbally was almost non-existent. In most cases, no matter how great you look, your inability to communicate effectively will hamper your progress. View your speech as a resource and use your speech to foster C.A.R.E (Create, Assess, Reason, Edify).
Always use your words to create peace. Refrain from instigating arguments or adding opinions and information to fuel confrontations. Most importantly, never repeat third-party statements. In the midst of confrontations, statements may be misinterpreted and taken out of context. Hear-say is never permitted in court and should have no place in your life. When in doubt, remain silent and just offer a listening ear.
Formulating a neutral assessment of a situation facilitates the creation of peace. Refrain from pointing out who's right and who's wrong. Trying to get both parties to see each other's perspective, is a much better approach. Taking sides sets up defenses and accomplishes nothing.
Never take sides unless one party is clearly and unequivocally wrong. In matters of opinions and interpretations, it's much better to take the perspectives approach. This approach lets those involved see where they went wrong without being scolded. If you're incapable of being an impartial mediator, don't get involved.
The foundation of all forms of conversation is reason. Reasoning involves an exchange of ideas, facts, and opinions. In order to engage in a insightful conversation, you must have knowledge pertaining to the subject matter; therefore, educate yourself. Before the job interview, research the company; before the date of your dreams, google current affairs; before buying a home; research, research, research. Knowledge boosts confidence by improving your ability to communicate intelligently.
Use your speech to educate, inspire, motivate and empower. When you make others feel better, you'll feel better also. Speak words of life and blessings. Remove all things negative from your thoughts and vocabulary, and avoid dead end speech. Instead of say, this is difficult, say this is challenging. Difficult implies that the task will never be accomplished, whereas challenging implies it can be done, with some thought and hard work.
Instead of being armed and ridiculous, use your speech to create the best you, use your speech to bring out the best in others, and watch your world transform into a more positive, oyful space.
Photo Credit to English at Edrissis
Ebonie-March Jones is a freelance contributor with MNI Alive