Spoken Word: That Deathless Death

That deathless death.
Oh, that deathless death!
Sweet torture, sweet torment.
Sweet heavenly bliss.

When I first heard the phrase I didn't know where to begin
Was I offering or being offered reparations for sin?
I thought of Will Shakespeare and Merchant of Venice
A debt owed had to be paid with Antonio's flesh
So, you be the judge and you sharpen your knife
An eye for an eye. What for an innocent life?
Their gathering places, their pious seduction
Some sit high, some sit low. Their choicest selection
A shrine built for worship yet so often misused
But a failure to visit genders condemning abuse
Some come for true worship, some just to be seen
All the while sins are growing while they primp and preen

When I next heard the phrase I was quite jaded by then
Confused and let down by the vain words of men
Bold promises erased, written at low tide on sand
Expectations still high. I just don't understand!
A solitary soul sent out searching for truth
Of the spoon-fed fables he devoured from youth
Where is my salvation and whom can I trust?
This survival is cruicial and I know that I must
I went to that church and I prayed and I sang
And for all but me, the freedom bells rang
Are my sins unforgiveable? No pennance for me?
Am I destined to live my death for all to see?

When I last heard the phrase how I quickly realized
Satisfaction and pleasure were not just meant for eyes
My soul was enraptured, my heart, it grew wings
And I finally knew for whom the bell rings
The demands were harsh, rewards meager at best
But I stayed through it all, through the pains in my chest
It constricted and ravaged and tore at my soul
I believed if I suffered I would somehow be whole
Vain words were a tempest that stifled, though wrong
I used their hallelujah and made my theme song
That deathless death, my deathless death, o rapture divine
Stay close to my bosom, for my sins are mine